The Halloween Surprise – Top US funny story


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A COUPLE was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need of his good time being spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went.

The wife, after sleeping soundly for one hour, awakened without pain, and as it was still early, she decided to go to the party. In as much as her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him. She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there.

His wife went up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new stuff that had just arrived. She let him go as far as he wished; naturally, since he was her husband. Finally he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had a little bang.

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Wish of The Lion – Grandma tales


Wish of The Lion :

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Once, a fierce lion lived in a forest. A woodcutter with his wife and their beautiful daughter Rupa lived in a small hut by the edge of the forest. One time the lion happened to see Rupa. He was so captivated by her beauty that he wished to make her his wife.

So the lion went to the woodcutter’s hut and roared loudly. “Woodcutter, I want to marry your daughter Rupa. If you refuse I will kill you all.”

The woodcutter said, “Let me ask my daughter first.”

He went inside the hut and came out a few minutes later. Then he said, “Rupa is scared of your sharp teeth and claws. She said if you would cut them off, she will agree to be your wife.”

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Three daughters – Adult Jokes


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The mother had three virgin daughters. All three got married almost at the same time and went on a honeymoon. The mother was very worried about the beginning of their sexual life, and asked them to send her at least a few words how it’s going.
The first one sent a postcard from Hawaii, just after two days after the wedding. On top of it there was just one word: “Nescafe”. Her mother ran into the  kitchen, find a coffee “Nescafe” and read on the label: “Blessing” until the  last drop”. Mother blushed, but was satisfied with her daughter’s happiness.
The second daughter sent the postcard from Jamaica a few days later, where she read “Benson n Hedges” cigars. She immediately went to the man’s room, where she found his “Benson Hedges” and read “Extra Long cigars. King Size”. She again shyly blushed, but was happy for her daughter.

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The Boss & the trainee – Fun * Fun * Fun


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A Man joined a big Multi National Company as a trainee. On his first day he dialed the pantry and shouted into the phone, “Get me a coffee quickly!”

The voice from the other side responded, “You fool you’ve dialed the wrong extension! Do you know who you’re talking to, dumbo?”

No”, replied the trainee.

“It’s the Managing Director of the company, you fool!” The man shouted back, “And do you know who YOU are talking to, you fool?”

“No”, replied the Managing Director. “Thats Good!”, replied the trainee and put down the phone!

HaHa! I hope you learn from this and that this never happens to you!!

** The End **

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Bear Hunting – Funny story series


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A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. He carries his trusty 22-gauge rifle with him. After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone.

A moment later the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, “No one shoots at me and gets away with it. You have two choices: I can rip your throat out and eat you, or you can drop your trousers, bend over, and I’ll do you in the ass.”

The hunter decides that anything is better than death, so he drops his trousers and bends over, and the bear does what he said he would do. After the bear has left, the hunter pulls up his trousers again and staggers back into town. He’s pretty mad.

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Smart Fishing – Today’s Fun


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A farmer in the country noticed that a gentleman would fish at the lake (close to the farmer’s house) and would always leave with a stringer full of fish. The fellow had a boat but a fishing pole was not to be seen.

The farmer mentioned the situation to the lake ranger. The ranger then started watching this man and all that the farmer said was true! The man would arrive at the lake in the morning and by early afternoon, he had a stringer full of fish. The ranger dressed like a fisherman one day and approached the man. They exchanged pleasantries and the stranger asked the ranger in disguise to come fish with him. They boated for 45 minutes and arrived at a secluded spot. The stranger then pulled out a stick of dynamite.

Ranger: “I’m going to have to place you under arrest – I am a Ranger and you are fishing illegally!”

The stranger calmly lit the stick of dynamite and handed it to the ranger. Stranger: “Are you gonna talk or fish?”

The End

Lawyer In Hell – It’s fun time


Lawyer In Hell

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lawyer died and was delivered into the devil’s hands. “You will be spending eternity here, but I’ll let you pick your own room from three I’ll show you,” the devil said.

In the first room were thousands of people standing on their heads on a brick floor. “I don’t like that,” said the man. “Show me the second.”

In the second room were thousands of people standing on their heads on a wood floor. “Well, that’s better than brick,” the man said, “but show me the third.”

In the third, thousands of people were standing ankle-deep in a room full of warms infested garbage, all drinking coffee.

“I’ll choose this room,” he said.

Into the room he went and the door slammed behind him.

Immediately, the voice of a minor demon rang out, “OK, coffee break is over, back on your heads.”

The End

The White Snake – short story


The White Snake

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A long time ago there lived a king who was famed for his wisdom through all the land. Nothing was hidden from him, and it seemed as if news of the most secret things was brought to him through the air. But he had a strange custom, every day after dinner, when the table was cleared, and no one else was present, a trusty servant had to bring him one more dish. It was covered, however, and even the servant did not know what was in it, neither did anyone know, for the king never took off the cover to eat of it until he was quite alone.

This had gone on for a long time, when one day the servant, who took away the dish, was overcome with such curiosity that he could not help carrying the dish into his room. When he had carefully locked the door, he lifted up the cover, and saw a white snake lying on the dish. But when he saw it he could not deny himself the pleasure of tasting it, so he cut off a little bit and put it into his mouth. No sooner had it touched his tongue than he heard a strange whispering of little voices outside his window. He went and listened, and then noticed that it was the sparrows who were chattering together, and telling one another of all kinds of things which they had seen in the fields and woods. Eating the snake had given him power of understanding the language of animals.

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Time Please … from the best series of “just for fun”


Time Please …

A man is strolling past the mental hospital and suddenly remembers an important meeting.

Unfortunately, his watch has stopped, and he cannot tell if he is late or not. Then, he notices a patient similarly strolling about within the hospital fence.

Calling out to the patient, the man says, “Pardon me, sir, but do you have thetime?”

The patient calls back, “One moment!” and throws himself upon the ground, pulling out a short stick as he does. He pushes the stick into the ground, and, pulling out a carpenter’s level, assures himself that the stick is vertical.